What couples experience in the Tantra Temple
In the Tantra Temple we welcome couples at all ages and stages of their relationship. Whether they are freshly in love, have been married for decades, lost their passionate spark, can hardly keep their hands off of each other, come to heal sexual traumas, or even – in rare cases – as a last resort before break-up or divorce.
They have in common that they are all searching for intimacy. For the sensation of truly being and feeling together and for understanding each other deeply. The beginning of a relationship brings an intensity of the love which usually unites the lovers easily and brings the joy and happiness of fresh togetherness. Over time, problems appear, busy schedules and the routine of daily life makes it harder to feel close, to have quality time together and to nourish and grow the love.
Couples who come to the Tantra Temple experience that their lives and their relationships transform. In the temple they find an oasis of peace; an environment that was set up to calm the mind, awaken the senses and focus on love and sensuality. In this article, a few of the couples who have been visiting the temple consistently share with you how they have discovered treasures that impacted their lives and relationship and how it provided them with a fountain of intimacy.
A first treasure the temple is offering the couples is the gift of quality time. One guest says, recommending couple massages: “It is a wonderful experience, especially if you have been in a long relationship and things have become routine – or if you are in a new(ish) relationship and wish to avoid the routine!” Tantra massage breaks the routine and helps couples to be present with each other in the here and now, meeting from heart to heart.
The tantric massage helps us relax deeply, calms down an agitated mind, and supports us in being intimate and open with one another. We always recommend couples to create that kind of dedicated and precious couple time at home as well. One couple has done this for the last two years after they came to us for the first time: “We took courses in couple massage at the temple and practice at home twice a week, reserving this special time to share love with each other.” By creating such a sacred space for intimacy they feel that they can finally offer each other that quality time and connection they have been longing for.
“An erotic education is not part of the general curriculum when growing up. We don’t receive lessons on how to love, how to be intimate and how to touch and make love”
A second treasure couples find in the temple is the deepening of their connection. One couple expressed their wish or intention when visiting for the first time: “We both hoped it would help our understanding for each others’ needs and give us back our trust and courage in making love.” And when they were asked how the massages impacted their relationship, they shared: “Where to start? Everything has improved: more understanding, more patience, more kindness, more joy in being together, more and more playful lovemaking.” Apart from understanding each others’ needs better, they discovered the importance of taking care of their own needs as well: “I learned to feel, define and voice my own needs and limits in all my relationships instead of trying to fulfill others’ needs.”
For some it might sound surprising but a tantric massage often improves the couples’ communication as well. We say that touch is the language of the heart and by learning to be in touch with one another, we learn to communicate more intimately. We feel each other better, understand each other deeper and create the connected space which is needed in order to share things honestly. As one guest says: “it improved my courage to discuss difficult topics in our couple relations. Yes, tantra and the massages have given us a ‘language’ for talking about couple related topics, such as sexuality, love … ”
Love and Eros
An erotic education is not part of the general curriculum when growing up. We don’t receive lessons on how to love, how to be intimate and how to touch and make love. A third treasure that couples experience is that the massages and teachings help them transform their love-life, intimacy and eroticism. As one couple expresses:
“We gained an understanding of what lovemaking actually is and can be without focusing on orgasm, but enjoying whatever is happening in the moment. We experience a whole new world of trust and intensity through Yoni and Lingam massage, the ability to surrender ourselves to our feelings and pleasure in lovemaking and to not let doubts, thoughts and insecurities disturb it. We feel more self confidence and less self-conscious, we gained more acceptance of each other, ourselves and our desires.”
They felt how their love-life got enriched when they discovered that “other than sex we now cherish expressions of intimacy, love and even eroticism, such as: a simple kiss, a long hug in the morning, a tender touch on the doorstep, a walk in the woods, watching the sun rise – everything can be full of love when you are open to it.”
Visits to the Tantra Temple often bring unexpected gifts, bonuses we can say. While one comes with a certain intention, often one leaves with a new perspective. As a guest says:
”It turned out to be a life-changing experience for me, and I have changed my view and experience of sexuality, started doing yoga and meditation and joined tantra classes – so I did not know what had hit me… But I liked it!”
When receiving a couple massage or a teaching in the Tantra Temple couples are often deeply touched by remembering what truly matters. In the light of the experience of overwhelming love, unity and connection, a wish awakens for a deeper realization of one’s true nature. A spiritual practice is highly recommended if you want to deepen the gifts the massage brings and to support your journey of self-discovery. Another couple explains: “the visits to the temple have also led us to practise mindfulness and meditation on a daily basis, which has brought along a higher level of calmness and positivity in all aspects of daily life.”
A Fountain of Intimacy
These are only a few of the gifts that couples receive when they come to the temple, and we can surely say that it generally increases the couple’s happiness and fulfilment. As a guest says “over time, the massages have helped me to gain better control over my general mood – to avoid being a grumpy old man!” And the same is true for couples.
The fountain of intimacy that couples find in the oasis of peace that the Tantra Temple offers, waters the seed of their love, their connection and their attraction which in time can make it bloom and blossom like a heavenly garden. And with the right tools and attention, they become gardeners of their relationship where they learn how to make a daily shift from routine or stress to nourishing and uplifting togetherness.